March 30, 2012

Mean Boss at Your Office? - Try This!

Start with managing your mind at work. Stress, anger, and worry top the list of unhealthy feelings. How do you deal with these issues? The single most important factor is to develop a positive approach to your workday, no matter what the conditions are. It’s a powerful way to eliminate these issues, and a bonus is that you will have more energy and will enjoy your work more. Look for the good in all things. Be grateful. Keep returning to a positive attitude – it’s healthy and clears your mind to solve problems and improve the situation. This will help you manage the stress, anger, worry, interpersonal relationships, and even help manage deadlines.

Now, for the bad boss. Try the neuropathway bypass.
One special mind-management technique needs to be reviewed for workplace stress. Do you have a cruel and spiteful boss, supervisor, or coworker? Use the neuropathway bypass. What is it? People develop a response pathway in the brain when they see this person, hear the person or even see the name on the pager or cell phone. It produces an automatic knot in the stomach, increased blood pressure, increased breathing, sweaty palms, and a rapid pulse. The stress level spirals out of control, and if left unchecked will lead to serious illness. Instead of using this unhealthy, ingrained neuropathway, create a healthier track by bypassing the negative pathway. The method is simple, and can be applied to all types of unpleasant situations. It takes two to three minutes, twice daily, for two to three weeks.
Here’s how it works. In the morning, visualize the image of the feared or aversive person in your mind until it triggersanger-related feelings in the pit of your stomach. When this happens, say two soothing words to yourself repeatedly – “love and peace” or “peace and strength.” Say the words over and over until the feeling of anger subsides, usually in about two to three minutes. Repeat this in the evening. Think of the hostile image, allow the knot of anger to develop in the stomach, and again repeat the two words to yourself until the unpleasant feeling subsides. The next morning, visualize the image, experience the unpleasant response, and repeat the two words. Repeat this exercise each morning and evening for two or three weeks.

Sarah tried it. This is what happened. During her early-morning run, she triggered the knot in her stomach by visualizing her boss berating her. She started repeating “peace and strength” to herself over and over, and found, to her surprise, that after about two minutes, the feeling completely disappeared and was replaced by a soothing feeling. This calming feeling didn’t last long – the minute she saw the boss’s car in the parking lot, the anguish quickly returned. This is expected, the aberrant neuropathway had taken months to create, and it would take time to build a bypass. So, on the way home from work, Sarah repeated the exercise again in her car. The tightening in the stomach quickly returned as she visualized the boss, but again she was pleasantly surprised to find it replaced with a soothing feeling. She continued the exercise for several more days. Gradually, around the seventh day or so, she realized that, when she visualized her boss, she was having a hard time triggering the unpleasant feeling in her stomach. This was strange and she didn’t believe it at first, but after two to four more days, no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t trigger the fear and anguish when she visualized her boss. It was an amazing experience. This new development gave her a renewed feeling of strength. After two weeks, Sarah realized that when she saw her boss or heard the name at work, it meant nothing to her. She had absolutely no fear and no stress. Her face appeared serene. She was no longer a victim. Several days passed, and the boss was about to begin the usual verbal public lashing during one of Sarah’s team meetings. She was standing about 12 inches away from her boss’s nose. She looked directly at the pupils of her boss’s eyes and smiled. At that moment, Sarah had an overwhelming feeling of calmness with no increased heart rate, anger, or fear. The boss blinked a couple of times, said nothing, and left the room. Months of hostility had come to an end. The boss later found someone else to torment. Sarah returned to her work full of energy and enjoyed her creative work. If you find yourself in this negative-feedback loop, learn the bypass method. You can use it in multiple situations. As time passes, it will take less than a few days to develop a bypass. You regain your strength. Your creativity returns. You are a stronger person.

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